Sunday, August 03, 2008

The Vatican vs. Gertrude Stein (Part XV)

THE VATICAN: In the contemporary context of cultural relativism and religious pluralism the number of non-baptized infants has grown considerably, and therefore the reflection on the possibility of salvation for these infants has become urgent. In these times, the number of infants who die unbaptised is growing greatly. This is partly because of parents, influenced by cultural relativism and religious pluralism, who are non-practising, but it is also partly a consequence of in vitro fertilisation and abortion. Given these developments, the question of the destiny of such infants is raised with new urgency.

GERTRUDE STEIN: There is no pope.


Blogger Susan said...

There is no McCain.

thanks, Shimmy.

12:19 PM  
Blogger Shimmy said...

There is no McCain. There is no Maverick. Emptiness is not other than McCain, and Maverick is also not other than emptiness. In this way, McCain is not undefiled, nor does Maverick have any increase.

1:09 PM  
Blogger adam said...

shimmy, what are you thinking? the vatican? gertrude stein? no one is talking about that down at the barber shop. this is what they're saying...

roger: these are the things Brett Favre has done in his career:

- created the forward pass
- built Lambeau Field out of magnolia leaves
- solved America's economic crisis
- backed up Don 'Magic Man'Mahowski
- cured river blindness throughout Northern Wisconsin
- gave ESPN a reason to broadcast
- carried John Madden across America on his back
- captured Osama Bin Laden (he's in a secret holding cell in Appleton, WI)
- created snow and mountains and river and lakes and light
- went 0-10 in Dallas

dan: yes, well, you forgot that the Favre has:

- passed gas with Cameron Diaz
- looked great in green and yellow... especially when the green was the turf from his own 5 yard line stuck in the face guard of his own helmet
- hopelessly attempted to maintain his sceptical and pragmatic catholic beliefs amongst a league full of born again christians
- lent his name to a wife who then raised money for (against, really) breast cancer
- took a laxative induced shit at 9:30 a.m. before each game on sunday
- on one occasion flew in coach all the way from Milwaukee to Los Angeles
- in the last years of his career he took a keen interest in Dutch naval supremacy from 1600-1800
- it is rumored that he has a penchant for donuts

roger: you shouldn't let a barber shave your head... you should do it yourself

dan: yes, it's a bloody mess... you know, i have a good friend in California that insists that america doesn't have an economic crisis, therefore there is no way that Favre could have solved what my friend says doesn't exist.

roger: dan, what i'm saying is that you should shave your own head.

1:41 PM  
Blogger Shimmy said...

But, Adam, Manny was the 2004 World Series MVP. I used to fall asleep in front of the TV all the time.

7:48 PM  

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