Thursday, February 12, 2009

Give Me Back My Red Squeaky Fromme Cape!

Karl Rove and Ed Rollins invited the War on Terror to the hospital, where it got a job as a bartender. Glenn Beck wiped blood from the "break" or "parting" stick he used to pry open fighting dogs' (pit bulls') mouths during fights. "If Mexico collapses," Glenn Beck said, "then refugees will come here to reclaim California and Texas." The Ex-Vice President of the War on Terror stole my red Squeaky Fromme cape when he fled the White House. Two unidentified members of the Shin Bet were surprised that everyone had gathered at the hospital in the War on Terror's honor. Ann Coulter and Laura Ingraham met Sean Hannity and E.D. Hill for an evening out. When the ladies were alone, E.D. Hill wanted to know why Ann Coulter wasn't devastated over not being able to have a baby, so Ann Coulter confided that she thinks about dead people when she's making love.

Fred Barnes and Michael Savage returned home and started getting frisky. Michael Savage assured Fred Barnes that Michelle Malkin was wearing my red Squeaky Fromme cape underneath her blouse (she wasn't). Michael Savage later felt guilty during their afterglow when he rhapsodized about the trust in their relationship. "If my red Squeaky Fromme cape is not returned to me, then any form of government as a result of these elections will not accept the two-state solution, they will not accept the agreements signed, they will continue with the settlements' activities and the incursions and the attacks," I said. Michael Savage told Fred Barnes: "And to this day, people wonder why JFK, Jr., died in a plane crash, and then suddenly, entering from stage left -- the carpetbagger Hillary Clinton, who moved to Chappaquiddick. And next, you know, she's running for the presidency." When they were getting ready for Round Two, Sean Hannity caught Ann Coulter trying to perforate another condom. He flew into a panic when she confessed to already punching holes into the first condom and that she could already be pregnant.


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