Tuesday, March 18, 2008

John McCain Denounces Glenn Beck for Torturing and Killing All Those Dogs (Pit Bulls)

I looked down in shame rather than gaze at the bare branches where shaggy chamomiles rustled last summer from the Mayakovsky Tree. I twitched -- the faint whiff of floss string from beneath the carpet. John McCain gave a great speech today and I completely agree with him. Mark Garvin caught 60 squirrels, but when do I get to taste them? Might as well throw a baited line on the greasy couch. Play the fiddle in a yellow shirt. Sound a rusty oboe. Crawl friendless on my last remaining leg from behind the roofs of Bear Stearns and pay James Cayne $30 billion to play bridge and twitter grayly like a quail!

I completely agree with John McCain's repudiation of Glenn Beck for torturing and killing all those dogs (pit bulls). "Glenn Beck's torturing and killing of those pit bulls was not only wrong but divisive," he said. Funny how Glenn Beck never talks about those dogs anymore. I could rip to shreds the miniature tennis ball soaked in catnip, thinking it's mighty as God himself. "It’s common knowledge and has been reported in the media that Al Qaeda is going back into Iran and receiving training and are coming back into Iraq from Iran," McCain said in his speech. "That’s well known. And it’s unfortunate." Then Joe Lieberman, who punishes us because we don't love him enough, corrected him. The tennis ball thinks it's great big God almighty but is a dunce. "I'm sorry," McCain said, "the Iranians are training extremists, not Al Qaeda."


Blogger Nathan Bransford said...

I don't understand this post but I think I like it.

11:02 PM  
Blogger Michael Lonergan said...

I had never heard that one!

10:28 PM  

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